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Anna and I waited in his apartment for him to get home. I was dressed in lingerie with thigh highs and stilettos, and all black. She was wearing almost the same thing as me. We waited on the couch watching porno movies that were all threesomes. I was a little nervous when I heard the door. The door opened and Dan walked in. His eyes went to the couch almost immediately and he saw us sitting there side by side smiling at him. He was not drunk, but he definitely had a good buzz on. Anna leaned in toward me and put her hand on my thigh. “What do you think, Dan, isn’t she pretty? I want us to fuck her tonight.” Her hand stroked my thigh and traced the top of my panties. His mouth was hanging open and he just stood there. He was in shock at the surprise of it all. I noticed that his eyes kept wandering over my body and straying to where her hand was tracing the top of my panties. “Dan, it’s ok,” I whispered. “I want this as much as you.” A slow grin spread over his face and he. It seems to be a tradition of some sort.”The new commander called the old one to ask what the reason was, and the previous commander said; “I don’t know. The commander before me had guards on the bench, so I just kept it going.”After contacting three previous commanders as well, and still getting the same answer, the new commander finally found a retired General (nearly 100 years old) and asked; “Sir, I am the new commander at the base you were in charge of 60 years ago. I found two men assigned to stand guard on a bench near the mess hall. Can you please tell me why?”After a pause, the General replied; “What? Is the paint still wet?”????????????????Thank tavern_knight for this one~“So when the first pig asked the man for straw to build his house with...”“What do you think the man was thinking?”One of the teacher’s students in the back of the room, called out, “Fuck me, a talking pig.”????????????????A well planned retirementThere is a lot written about this story. Apparently, it is.
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